just doing the things

I feel really sad these days. I have so much time in the day but not nearly as much motivation as I would if I was working on these comic pages at night. I have so much trouble just starting a work session and getting into my usual work flow when I’m hyper-focused and productive. It’s just gonna have to be this way, at least for a while until hopefully, I can get some semblance of that same night-time focus. The day is just primetime for interruptions and noise. I really hate it.

One of the things I really hate about working on extremely personal work during the day is that the day time doesn’t feel like it “belongs to me.” I have to share the sound space with other people, for example. At night it feels like I’m the only one in the world who is awake while everyone else is asleep and the world is dead quiet. I feel so much safer to be myself and work on the body of work that represents me in my utmost authenticity.

I’m in a preferable scenario though. Better this than headaches that don’t go away for days, or migraines. I just have to make this work. I’m sure I’ve got better days ahead of me. For now I have to keep reminding myself to work on my pieces one hour at a time and not tell myself that I’m too slow. Every hour I put in counts.
I’m taking my time at the moment to try to change up the style more to my liking and to make it a bit quicker to complete. It’s not easy, but I think it’ll definitely help me feel much better about the process and the results.
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